Feeling Stressed and Overwhelmed? Learn to say NO!
Do you ever feel stressed, frazzled, overwhelmed or like there's never enough time to get everything done? Do you ALWAYS feel that way? Do you want off the hamster wheel?
More and more these days I hear these comments from my clients, friends, family, colleagues and even new people I meet. How come, I ask? What's going on in our world today that has a majority of people experiencing this? Here's the short answer: We don't know how to manage our commitments!
We tend to blame our ability to manage time as the culprit, but I believe we've been looking in the wrong place for years. In fact, I claim there is no such thing as time management! What, you say? You must be kidding! I'm not!
Think about it. Can you slow down the clock during your day? Can you stop the second hand from ticking? Can you add much needed time to the end of your day? Nope!
We've got to go back to the basics folks. In every moment of your day you have a CHOICE about what you want to do. And, most people are not aware of that. What we don't see is that we're often choosing to OVER COMMIT ourselves. In other words, we can't do everything we commit to do, for ourselves and/or others. We say YES to too many things, now we're over committed, we've exceeded our CAPACITY in a day, and guess what the outcome is? Stress, overwhelm, always feeling rushed, frazzled and like you can't take a moment to rest.
The answer often is: You've got to learn to say NO! It's literally that simple, I promise you, but not always easy. Here are some ways to reduce your stress and overwhelm through more effectively managing your commitments:
-
Learn to say NO, counter-offer or commit to give an answer at some time later.
-
Learn to leave some "white space" in your schedule. In other words, don't schedule meetings or tasks back-to-back with no time in between.
-
Get clear about what you want and where you're headed. When you do that, it makes it easier to say no to offers that come your way that don't fit your vision.
-
Take a hard look at your current list of commitments (called To Do's) and see which ones you can ask others to do, renegotiate or even revoke.
-
Learn to ask others for help. You don't have to be a Lone Ranger. In fact, in today's world, it's nearly impossible to do everything yourself.
-
Learn to not have to be doing something all the time. That's a strong impulse in our culture and we need to learn to be OK with doing absolutely NOTHING - in other words, just BEING.
When you learn to better manage your commitments, you will learn to be more peaceful. And, you'll learn to be more present in all your relationships and conversations, which will help you create connected, strong relationships.
Upcoming Workshop with Management Solutions Group
For people who want to learn to manage their commitments and more effectively coordinate action in the workplace, I am offering the workshop Creating a Culture of Commitment and Accountability on August 18th through Management Solutions Group. Please check out the workshop description for more details and to register for the workshop.
Upcoming Executive Coaching Program with Tennessee Coaches Alliance
The Tennessee Coaches Alliance is bringing in John Lazar for their September meeting, and if you're interested in learning more about executive coaching, you don't want to miss this! John is a nationally known and respected executive coach. Check out the Program Description for more details. We hope to see you there!
Please don't hesitate to call or e-mail me if you want to learn more about personal coaching, executive coaching, or creating a custom workshop for your organization or group.
Please feel free to pass this message on to friends, family and colleagues you think might be interested and ask them to sign up to receive future newsletters.
